Tips for Getting Back to Normal Life

I am sitting here, in front of my computer with a cup of chai, drawing a blank. Christmas and New year were a whirlwind of life and the last few days have been an attempt to get back to the regular routines that define our normal lives. I have spent hours sitting in my kitchen, surrounded by piles of clean laundry and dirty dishes, thinking “I need to do something about this” but not really sure how to start. Then a child will come in and ask about dinner which will snap me into enough action to create more dishes to wash. The child is fed but the day is over and I am still in a bit of a fog.

I realize I am not the only mom in this daze so, working with that assumption, I will help both you and myself - let’s get back to the daily grind and do it with panache! The regularity of school is a fantastic way to reestablish our routines after the holidays. In our home, today was the day we started back. But if you are going to get back to the normal ways of life you will have the greatest success if you prepare the day (or two days) before. Kids always need help with transition so start getting them ready mentally and emotionally before the actual shift. I had each of my children prepare the night before by picking out clothes to be worn the next day and letting them know they will be expected to be dressed in those clothes by a certain time. Another way to help prepare them for a normal routine the next day is to reinstate the normal routine at bed time. I’m sure that I am not the only one who lost track of how late dinner was served, when kids went to bed, stories that were supposed to be read, and who had baths on what night. Getting back to the right bedtime routines will make the whole next day smoother. 

Another thing that makes the shift back to regular life easier for the kids is seeing Mom do the things she regularly does. I know we are talking about how challenging it can be for us to get back into it but helping our children to do so is a powerful motivator - at least for me! All of our lives will be easier if the kids are comfortably walking out their daily duties so if I can aid that by doing it myself count me in! I know my kids will get up, dress, and be ready for breakfast on time if I have set my alarm and am in the kitchen preparing food. I may be walking in a fog but I’m walking! What do I do every morning? I get up at six. I wake up my kiddos with the same words everyday - “Time to rise and shine!” - I turn on all the lights and tousle hair or kiss a forehead. I go to the kitchen and start prepping food. “Have some breakfast”, “Feed and water the dogs”, “did you brush your teeth?”, “Did you brush your hair?”. I can do all of this with half a brain.

Next big hurdle is finding our way back to paying attention to academics. This might be best accomplished incrementally. Don’t expect a child to be able to go from no structured learning to hours of structured learning overnight. It would even be hard to go from all free play to all structured play without a buffer period. I would recommend starting your first school day with a set (short) amount of time (depending on the child's age) for some scholastic focus and then giving some time for the student to choose an educational activity - a book they want to read or a puzzle they are interested in. Give time for movement and then, again, some scholastic focused work. Even with a teenager, you may have the most success if the work that requires physical self control and mental attention is interspersed with something less restrictive or something personally engaging for the student. Having something that is a regular and predictable part of their scholastic life will help - like knowing your Adventure Letter will be coming and can be enjoyed as part of your normal routine! If you have a regular day for curtain activities be sure to use that to your advantage. When I was a kid, Thursday was “my day” and I got to check the mail, help fix lunch, ride up front in the car, or whatever unique task my mom had for me to perform. Each of my siblings “had a day”. That was something I could count on as part of my routine.

For you, the mama/teacher, set reasonably attainable goals. Don’t try to plan the rest of the year, start with the rest of the week. What needs to be accomplished this week? A return to normal life! What do the kids need to be able to do by the end of the week? For my kids, they need to feel they are back in the flow of things. They need to get back on their regular sleeping habits. They need to readjust to no screens on school days. They need to eat at their regular intervals. They need to be able to focus during class time. If I can help them do that then I have reached my goals for this week and am ready to plan the next week (or month).

Take a deep breath Mama’s - You got this!