Training Our Children to Give

As we enter the season for giving thanks I would like to share my thankfulness for giving. Generosity is a big way that we can demonstrate our appreciation for what we have. The fact that we have something to give - that we have the ability to give - shows that we have something to be thankful for and when we act in that ability our eyes are open to see it. Giving also elevates our spirits, bringing joy. Giving helps us to be compassionate and makes us think about others rather than ourselves. Giving makes us feel like (and truly be) an important part of our community. It makes us better aware, more understanding, a better friend, a better human. 

Something as valuable as the practice of giving needs to be a regular part of our lives but interestingly, despite its benefits, giving is not something that comes naturally to most people. It is not only a conscious choice, it is a hard thing to choose if the habit is not developed early (and even then it can be an exercise of the will). Like every healthy habit - brushing teeth, eating veggies, avid reading, good manners, plenty of exercise - giving should be trained into a child early and often. A child as young as two or three can be involved in cheerful giving and volunteering (which is giving of your time). 

Several years ago we moved away from everything that we had known as home and transferred our family to a new state. It was a challenging season for many reasons, one of which was financial hardship. We moved into our new apartment but had no money to furnish it. Our church provided us with some mattresses to sleep on and directed us to a woman who ran a charity that supplied families with home needs and clothing. She helped us get a couch, bunkbed, a table and chairs… even clothes for our kids. Because of the generous giving of others in our new community we had the things we needed.

I wanted our children to know and appreciate what giving can do so within a week of receiving that gift we began volunteering at this woman's charity. We couldn’t give money but we had time that we could share. My youngest child at the time was only four and my oldest was twelve. Each child was given an appropriate job - sorting clothes, checking to see if a toy worked or had all the parts, matching a teddy bear with a blanket. We help people who were worse off than we were by finding them needed items for their homes or family. My children got to be a part of the community that serves and is served - people helping people so we all can live better. They got to see that everyone can help and that even small jobs are important.

My four year old could do things like color matching and carrying small things to their correct box, but one of the most beautiful things he did was not even technically a job. There was an older lady (in her 70’s at least) who worked there. She would sit and fold clothes all day, using her time to love others as best as she could. My little boy would often go sit with her and just talk her ear off. Whatever was rattling around in his little noggin would come out his mouth - spiderman, the tag in his shirt, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, the toy he had just tried out, his left shoe… if he thought about it he would tell her about it! I’m fairly sure she could only hear half of what he said, and make sense of even less, but she absolutely loved having him there. She would nod her head or ask him questions, fully engaged with him and invested in the wandering thoughts of my sweet baby. He gave that woman a plethora of precious gifts; He let her know she mattered, he gave her joy, companionship, and childlike wonder! And she gave him a gift too. She listened and let him know he mattered as well. 

We are in a better place in our lives now. My husband has a good job and we have established our home. We are not in as much need now as we were when we first arrived but we still make room in our lives to give our time to this charity because giving is not about what you can get out of it. There are perks and rewards but the best reward is letting someone else know that they are valuable and cared for. It made all the difference to my family when we needed it. It will make that same impact on someone else.

I am so thankful that I can give